So the desync is actually telling you that your version of the game you are playing has diverged from your opponent's.  The game may appear to be continuing normally, but it's not, and it won't reconverge. 

A solution may be to have the game say "Desync detected" and then give you options for ending the game and restarting or just exiting to desktop immediately.

So what happens on a desnc on my opponents game? Is my character being played by a bot?

Well, as long as something happens about after thursday I'd be happy. Either a forced kick or at least allowing us to continue playing and live with the funkiness

You are informed of who is desynced.  Of course, in a 3 player environment, if Perason A says Person B is desynced, Person B will show the same thing for A.  You have to use Person C to, ah, triangulate where the desync actually is.

I know the desyncs are (or at least can be) bigger than just a different stat value for stuff.  I had a desync with a friend occur towards the end game, and the games ended very, very differently.  As a matter of fact, one person won their game, the other was mercilessly crushed .