I dunno, but if memory serves, Shift+Enter sends to allies only.
Alternatively you can use the overlay. Shift+Tab to bring it up, CTRL+mouse drag to resize elements. Then all you have to do is agree with your friend on a channel name and both of you hit "/channel #name" & chat away.
You can also run the game windowed by creating a shortcut and adding the command line modifier " /window X Y" where X & Y are pixel width and hight, and run your preferred IRC/messenger thingy alongside the game.