What are you pirates doing?!?? Pirates aren't buddy buddy. Pirates aren't submissive. And pirates darn right aren't happy with their life. A proper pirate clan would organize itself into many factions with each faction vying for power and influence and mutinying when dissatisfaction with leadership is high.

So what are you waiting for? Start acting like proper pirates already or do I have to beat it into? And if you don't know what proper behavior is, you don't belong here anyways.

Just stirring up some trouble

BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
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RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
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RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!!!!!!!

Wha... ?

(edit: Podinn me. Tha kinnda messsed ub yer ssshtory wwitho thu carrig rrretirn.)

[Message Edited]

Crack of Dawn Roll Call

Ambient light slowly increased aboard the Survey Ship of Doom. The galactic stage was again forming for the slumbering pirates. It would be another day full of swashbuckling and plundering for them to take pleasure in.

Given the heightened activity of several rival empires, the crew had been split into only two shifts. This increased the available manpower, but the strain was beginning to show on their stubbly faces. Both shifts formed into three ranks with PontiusBruinPilot and Gerakken standing before the formation.

Pontius nodded to Gerakken, a signal to begin. The Spymaster turned to face the crew and bellowed, "REPORT!"

At the head of the first rank EBZeroMatrix responded, "Staffa, CypherPax, Landrew, Craig Wilson present. svalin, HG321, Exarch, RXDOC, DragonFire, humane on assignment."

At the head of the second rank Gibbie99 followed. "IceMole, sixtoes, sjl, Vash258 present. Coffeedragon, The D, Welshman, Thelon Fairblade, Ramonixle, Capt. Chaos on assignment."

At the head of the third rank black smoke finished. "KitWarrior, stealthfrequency, Darth Bob present. Shakaar, jus4golf, LotC, Freya, plamons, Azog, strykerstorm on assignment."

Geraken turned to face Pontius. "All raiders accounted for, Capt'n!"

"Very well. Pirates of G.R.O.S.S., before the day shift begins its duties, and before the night shift is released, KitWarrior has a few words to share with us this crisp morning." Moans emanated from the formation. The Captain kept them in check with a piercing glare as Kit sprinted to the front of the formation.

"Fellow marauders, we remain the most powerful empire in the Metaverse!" The pirates mustered a respectable hoorah. "But our adversaries continue to pursue us. They continue to capture neutral sectors. They continue to play mind games." Kit paused for dramatic effect. "We will plunder their newly acquired sectors!" Another hoorah erupted. "We will show them that they play their mind games in vain!" Yet another hoorah. "Wizards, farmers, zombies, jedis, superheroes... they do not know that our bonds are stronger than that of siblings. Space is a merciless monster that devours even the best of crews, yet we have triumphed!" More hoorahs. "The toils and tribulations of our adventures have created our unbreakable bond. Let them mock us! Let them play their pranks! We shall deliver the final laugh... THROUGH VICTORY!!!" Blades were raised high and a mighty holler echoed throughout the ship.

Gerakken stepped forward to issue commands. "Day crew, fallout! Night crew, dismissed!" The scoundrels of the Metaverse dispersed... with a new spirit in their step.

[Message Edited]
[Message Edited]

CypherPax stood in the massive hanger of the survey ship of Doom surrounded by a bunch of school children, Mid-Western school children. Cypher had thought the request was unusual, but the decent folk of the MWC had been interested in the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie and wanted their kids to experience the thrill of being on a space pirate vessel.

A wholesome toe-headed boy of 10 in suspenders, asked ‘Why do they call this the Survey Ship of Doom? It’s not a Survey Ship at all.’

‘That’s a good question, Tommy.’ replied CypherPax.
‘The bridge of the Survey Ship of Doom contains the original bridge of a PontiusBruinPilot’s survey ship. However, GROSS has long outgrown the ship. We have added on until the ship has gotten to it’s current size.’

A cute little blonde girl was half-hiding behind her teacher,
‘Are pirates bad?’ she asked.
Her teacher tried to hush her. Cypher said,
‘No, don’t worry. Other pirates are bad. We are good pirates… we rob from the rich and give to ourselves, the poor, unfortunate, kindhearted pirates of G.R.O.S.S. Gosh, we’re particularly a charitable organization.’
The class gasped at Cypher’s near use of a curse word, but it was evident that they went more comfortable.

A boy with a toy tractor asked ‘How big is the survey ship of Doom? Is it as big as an Excalibur?’
Cypher smiled, ‘The survey ship is even bigger than an Excalibur. It it over a mile long and has over 40 decks. You might wonder why we need such a big ship. However, there are a lot of evil people who that resent our friendly, generous disposition and don’t want us for neighbors. That’s the reason we wanted to show you are ship. To show you how kindly we are.’

Cypher smiled he had a fun afternoon planned. The class practiced climbing the rigging of a pirate ship model in the hold, they drank grape juice for tankards, and even got to walk the plank that had been set up over a swimming pool.

At the end of the tour, CypherPax took the Mid-westerner children back the hanger bay. It was getting close to happy hour and the pirates were checking back into the base.

‘Would you like to go for a ride on my survey ship?’ asked CypherPax. The class was excited about going on a real pirate ship. CypherPax explained to class that due to completely unfounded reputation of pirates, other ships avoided pirate vessels. To overcome that, pirates had souped up as harmless survery ships. CypherPax related how he had recently lost his survey ship to the Drendin and had lost 4 ships in the course of his career. He explained how this current ship was outfiited with an Attack of 12, and Defense of 15, a Speed of 6and 90 HPs. CypherPax bragged about how his experienced crew could handle a squadron of frigates.

CypherPax took the helm and popped into hyperspace after rapid acceleration to almost .5 of light speed. This would normally be reckless, but Cypher was a skilled pilot and this was well within the tolerances for the retrofitted pirate ship. Cypher then pulled a 4D phased trick that bent the rules of time and space.

‘Look, kids. We’ve actually slipped back in time a little and now have time visit the Freedom Force Petting Zoo before heading back to the MWC.’ The kids cheered. The teachers were impressed when CypherPax’s survey ship handling gently in the corn field next to the school less than an hour of local time after the field trip departed.

Once the kid’s were off the ship, CypherPax grinned evilly. His campaign of indoctrinating the children of Mid-West had begun.

Later that evening during dinner at IdleProcess’s home, IdleProcesses daughter proclaims, ‘I want to be a pirate when I grow up.’ IdleProcess chokes and before he can respond to his daughter, Plephart’s face appears on the phone.

‘We’re having an emergency town hall meeting tonight. Apparently, there are reports of our children reading the G.R.O.S.S. Communication thread on the Metaverse Forums. Hopefully, we can figure out how to stop this before they become lifelong miscreants.’

………………………………

I did not want anyone thinking that I have left the ship. I still currenting to have problem with version 1.09 and working with Cari to resolve them. I probably eventually your to lose both games played and reinstalled the game and play version 1.05 only.

The MWC Town Hall was crowded this evening. The hall was packed with angry people and Senator IdleProcess had to bang the gavel THREE times before people settled down.

IdleProcess looked at the angry crowd apprehensively. He did not know quite how to start.

‘This is an outrage’ yelled an angry man in the bag. ‘Look at what Peggy-Sue brought home,’ shouted a women clutching a red bandana with a Jolly Roger on it. The crowd looked in horror as she pulled out a plastic rapier and an felt eyepatch from a small, pink Stawberry Shortcake backpack. ‘Peggy Sue says that every kid in the school got these souvenirs as a gift.’

Another mother project holovid pictures onto the ceiling. ‘Look at these digusting pictures, what are these unholy animals?’ Pictures of kids petting wombats, emus, bats, and drop bears appeared on the screen. Gerakken smiled to himself. Implicated the Freedom Force in this incident had been a brillant move on the part of CypherPax that he would have to congratulate him on. The crowd got even angrier when they saw a kid petting a sheep rigged with explosives.

That did not compare to their reaction at seeing their children in the GROSS taproom hoisting tankards (they could not tell from the picture that is was only grape juice.)

‘How did this happen?’ someone shouted. A teacher meekly took the stage. “Well, Principle Black Smoke announced the trip this morning and said that their wasn’t time to send out permission slips. We thought it was strange, but we had a substitute teacher, Mrs. Pax who said the kids would be perfectly safe since her husband would be giving the tour. Mrs. Pax is one of us – she spent three years in Oklahoma growing up. We should of suspected she was actually an Eastern at heart. But we’re Mid-Westerners, we’re not used to not trusting our own.” explained the teacher.

IdleProcess was sick to his stomach. Principle Black Smoke? Black Smoke is a GROSS senator! He knew he couldn’t afford to show his discomfort. Plephart was clearly thinking the same thing and jumped in with a question, ‘Where is this principle, Black Smoke?’

Black Smoke’s secretary was an kindly, elderly woman. ‘Principle Smoke, went home sick just after the kids left for the field trip. He isn’t well frequently… has to go home to his clan, strange he doesn’t call them a family, so they can take care of him. His fits must be bad, because when he comes back he often has a pounding headache, is sick to his stomach, and his eyes look strange. He’s a brave man who doesn’t let his ailment get to him. I try to respect his privacy, but I hard him refer to his ailment on the phone as being ‘one heck of a bender.’ Anyway, he went home.’

Plephart had a sinking feeling that he won’t find Principal Black Smoke on the planet. He asked the secretary, ‘When did Principal Black Smoke become principal? I thought Bob Smith was the principal.’

‘Oh, Principal Smith had to go out of town to take care of his sick nephew, EBZeroMatrix’ so Principal Black Smoke was just the acting principal’ replied the Secretary. ‘I did think it was strange that EBZero came to the office to pick his uncle up when he was so sick and all. He didn’t look that sick, he was quite a handsome, strapping young man.’ She said and blushed. ‘But you can never tell with illnesses these days. Principal Smith didn’t look happy to go, but family is family.’

IdleProcess had regained his composure. ‘People, you need to stay calm. We understand this has caused concern and the MWC response will be to catch these Evil-doerers wherever they hide.’

IdleProcess and Plephart closely the concern and wondered how they were going to explain this G.R.O.S.S. incursion to these innocent farmers.

Gibbie 99 has left the survey ship of doom to seek his destiny with the empire formerly known as the white council. He hath chosen Poorly. He hath chosen to be G.R.O.S.S. roadkill. Though he is a former Senator and we won't target him unneccesarily, neither, will he be shown any favoritism. Also, they merged with empire luminere.


Black Smoke: Don't worry, you'll be able to submit soon. And when you are, you'll shoot up the charts. Make sure your character is retied to a: the right serial # and email, b: here and c: the metaverse and 4. your stardock/drengin account. If all that is in place, and cari cannot solve it, I'd probably do the 1.05. Your problems have convinced me to wait for the expansion pack.

Gibbie doesn't feel that he has much in common with the GROSS empire. This is a trend that should be carefully monitored.

He remembers the good old days when we were really evil and ruled the galaxy with an iron fist. Now, the GROSS empire is mostly a bunch of happy-go-lucky alcoholics who pretend they are pirates, only soft, fluffy, squezable pirates. Gibbie wonders how we got to be so soft and cuddley.

Gibbie has been pondering for some time and has decided to join the Fellowship, who don't claim to be very evil but has more in common with him.

If I meet you on the high seas, then, sirs, I will salute you. Its been a fun ride but now it's time to shake the Metaverse up a bit. Get off your kegs of rum and dominate once again!

The decision between GROSS and the Fellowship was very difficult for me. Rest assured I would've joined GROSS in any other circumstances. But, I'm sure we'll have plenty to talk about since the Fellowship is now in first place.

Gibbie99,

Sorry to hear you decide to leave our empire. There are still a members of our empire that are still evil and probably are not as vocal about it like myself. I am currently have technical problem unable post some evil games. I hope you will re-consider joining our empire again in the future. Any way good luck with our new empire.

Pointus,

Thanks for your support. Since want to play some games and ready to some grilling. I think I will reinstall my laptop this weekend to version 1.05. Then leave my desktop computer with version 1.09 and working with Cari on the solution.

My last two games have been pure evil. My alignment should flip from nuetral soon I would think.... I think we really are the only evil-themed empire.

You sort of have to make light of it on the forums as you really can't go much past Kentucky Fried Drendin and Arcean Ribs without sounding like a complete sicko. Plus, I thought the evil thing was always sort of tongue in cheek. After all, G.R.O.S.S. is a Calvin and Hobbes reference.

Anyway, I wish you well Gibbie - as long as you're hanging around the boards that's a good thing.

-Cypher

~SDC~

Well put Cypher. Lets put on our paper hats and take back what is rightfully ours.

Gibbie: Let me get this straight. We aren't evil enough, so your solution is to join a good empire?
Go ahead and salute if we meet. In the meantime, we'll be shootin. Don't worry, I'll return the salute after the cannonball flies right through ya. Arrgh. And don't expect us to be soft and cuddly just b/c you were once a Senator.

Sometimes, we have to put on sheep's clothing. Doesn't mean we're going soft.


Lets see Evil board
1,2,4,5,10 half of the top 10 come from us.
11,28,31,35,38 5 more in the top 50

Neutral board
1,26,34,58

Good Board
8, 71,76,79

Hmmmmmmmmm. But we're not evil enough.

Say what's this puke on deck here. Hmmm a genetic analysis shows it to be Gibbie's. Ahhhh It's becoming clear now. C'mon back Gibbie, we have dramamine, no need to make excuses for being seasick.

Pontius Gathers his 40. officers together on deck with the several various crewmembers as well.

Alright matey's who thinks that because I am listed as neutral, we aren't evil enough.

One of the crewmembers raises their hand "I do."
Bang!!!!

Does anyone ELSE think me not evil enough? Thought not.

Pontius heads into sick bay. Dr. Quinn c'mere. Now!!! Or I'll cancel you faster than CBS. Have you been treating Gibbie for seasickness? Yes? You are supposed to be telling me these things Dr. Boy you were a heck of alot better looking on Battlestar Gallactica. Oh so he has been coming in here and puking after parties too. Oh my seasick and can't hold his booze either. No wonder he's leavin. Oh well. Hope he enjoys a little crystal cup of Mogen David once a week. Poor Chap. Meanwhile, back on deck, Pontius contemplates the evilness of his lil addition to the transmorgifriar prior to Kit's planting it on the aussies and decides... Well It's something I can live with. I just hope the effect is confined to the aussies.

Cypher: Fully agree with you

Pontius: If anything this should put the wind back in your sails. I look forward to crossing sheep with you someday. It was fun but GROSS has stagnated quite a bit lately, as usually happens in empire building...It's one thing to take first, it's another thing to keep it.

Until we meet again.

Now if you think you belong with the fellowship instead of with us that's fine. I have no problem with that. Just do it, be done, and know that is what you are doing and live with it. We truly don't care. Everyone is here only so long as he or she wishes and no more. That's the rule. So good luck. But don't attempt to rationalize your guilty feelings at leaving your mates by throwing out senseless hyperbole.

Hmmm first it was we were not evil enough, which we proved made no sense.

Now it's stagnating. Look at the players we just added. Now they don't have much score but so what? They will. We were in first for all but about 40 seconds of the last month, but that's stagnating. If anyone was stagnating, it was you. Two submissions since 6/22. The facts again are not with you when you call the kettle black Mr. Pot. And even if they we're, real men stick it out, they do not bail. So if you please, just go, have fun, and good luck. No hard feelings. Come by and drop us a line now and again. And if you think you wish to come back some day, by all means do so. It's your choice. But please oh please spare us the histerionics.

Speaking of Stagnating. I've been stagnating in my lawn mowing duties. BBL.


You're still the finest bunch of mates in the metaverse. Keep your chins up. Keep those blades sharp, for we raid soon.

Start playing that theme from Jaws mateys, we are on the comeback trail, just 3k down now.

Hey, no hard feelings. You have decided to be the gingerbread man, We, as you will soon see, shall be the clever alligators. Chomp Chomp baby.

Just posted. Am now 'officially' evil! Wow, we're in 3rd - but it's to close to call. Looks like while we distracted by the wizards, some missiles got launched our way. Maybe the school prank wasn't such a hot idea...

Pontius, what was your take on SWG? Why would it be TOO addictive? :notsure:

3rd? Heh...this just gets better. Lest does those empires know that the last trick hasn't been pulled out of my hat yet. Anyone notice the crank hasn't been crankin'? Heh, there's a good reason for that.

Sleep well GROSSers, for the other empires have much to fear soon

~SDC~

Heck, empire politics aside, the MWC have a brief moment of fame again. Someone else to take the bullets while we regroup after that stunning missile strike. But we always do our best work from behind, so go team!

I really wish you would stop saying you do your best work from behind Gerakken , its really unbecoming of you Hey and great work on the War of the Worlds thread, its quite a piece of literature for a pirate. Hope someone keeps it bumped up because this whole forum needs to read it and recognize hat I'm sure was a significant time investment of your in writing it.

But thanks anyways for teh congrats and who knows we at the MWC may surprise you yet and sustain our day in the sun for a bit longer...then again it does sounds like your lil buddy EB may have some more beginner games up his sleeve.

Oh and ask Pontius for me whether you guys are evil or not, our whole discussion about it long ago and now this defection have me all confused.
[Message Edited]

:notsure:

Sorry, couldn't help myself.

idle

~SDC~