And if lumps were raindrops how would your garden grow?

do you think he would need to grow mushrooms?

Mere cockle shells wouldn't be enough would they?

Not if you wanted to smoke mushrooms would they?

Smoke mushrooms??  Aren't they better in butter sauce with a pinch of garlic?

Don't the garlic make the smoke a little harsh?

Probably, and wouldn't the butter sauce make it harder to light??

Why do you want to light sauce?

Would you prefer a heavy sauce to a light sauce?

Or a heavy globe to a light globe?

Or how about a nice water pipe to cut the harshness, would that work?  

If it doesn't, could we use a water conduit instead?

Or how about a 2 liter bottle and a wastebasket?

Are we talking electrocution here?

Would that work as well as a hose pipe and a toolbox full of bottle tops?

Dunno, are you smokin it, or is it smokin you?

Why, can you see my underwear smouldering?

Smoldering?

Are you sure is only smouldering are there not any flames?

Yup, just smouldering.... crikey, can't you smell that?

Well, dried poo only smolders doesn't it?

OOPS!

when did you try that out then?

dried cow patties for fuel when camping wasn't it?

Never used them , always used wood, I think that is better don't you?