No. Spend your money on Graveyard upgrades.

Only if you have the Twig of Life.

And 6 restorative scrolls.

Yeah! I'm a Tool. And a Tool is close to a minion...so it must increase my stats!

We need to let the noobs know the secrets of the pros!

1. Never buy sigils, they're overrated
2. ALWAYS buy the armor items, they reduce the amount of damage you take!
3. NEVER take blood of the fallen as your favor item, you should always take swift anklet so you can capture more flags!
4. ALWAYS start with boots of speed, you need to be faasteeeeeer!
5. Lock your portal flags at the beginning of the game, you never know when they will try to ninja-cap them!

On a more serious note, minions are good fodder and can soak up damage that would otherwise go directly to the demigod.  If we are talking about idols, I don't believe that any general should be without monks early.  The siege and melee idols are optional, but I would get them if gold is not an issue and I'm taking down towers or holding a lane.  There is little more intimidating in a game than to see Erebus rounding the corner with a full set of idols and several night crawlers in tow.  I would also try to max out idols for Occulus and the Oak minion build. 

For QoT, skip shamblers in favor of spikes and shield, but eventually put at least one point in shamber and mulch.  Idols are good for QoT and, along with bramble shield, enhance her ability to take down towers.  I have yet to see a good Yeti build for Sedna, and I rarely seen Ball lightning used with Oculus. 

P.S. Or was this thread intended to be a joke?

Your life was almost ended, only thing keeping you alive is the distance between computers!!!!!

I usually start out by buying two hex scrolls, then I sell them back, then I buy monks. (I actually do this because I'm retarded)

unless you are going to be minion oak, don't buy ANY items for minions

but seriously guys.... I had a reg with 1.8k health at lvl like 10 and he said he had no money cause he only bought citadel upgrades. He died 20 times that game even though i bought a nimothe, hauberk and banded for him after his 10th death.

Don't question it! It has been written down so it must be true!