Thanks for the spending ratio hints, forceinfinity (fsk+ too, though I already was doing the 100% colony ship thing at the beginning)...
Going 100% military, 100% government spending, and doing all colony ships (maybe a scout here or there) definately seems the way to go at the start... but I've noticed that if I stay in that too long I have difficulty catching up in the tech race and the lag in getting to phasers and building my star fighter swarm puts me dangerously close to "give us 1500 bcs or we'll take all those nice looking planets you beat us to in the colony ship rush"-land... so 70-0-30 is becoming more and more attractive.
The compromise I'm thinking of is:
go 100-0-0 until 30% research will get you at least 26-27 points a turn,
then go 70-0-30, get comm theory in 2 turns, uni translator the next turn, weapons theory 2 turns after that, and phasers a number of turns after that, then shift a few of your inner colonies to pump out star fighters to keep the alien mafia away (my tech choices after that would be diplomacy to shift to republic, med theory and basic env control to get habs and industrial theory-propulsion theory-cold fusion-interstellar refining to get fusion power plants and manufacturing centers).
When the colony ship rush is over (you've got colony ships targeted at all uncolonized systems in range with a 15+ planet, or at least have enough colony ships near completion to achieve that) switch to 40-30-30 to get those soil enhancements, habs, and banking centers online while continuing down the tech tree and pumping out colony ships to backfill, star fighters to keep the military graph up (maybe defenders if you expect an actual war), a few freighters when you get trade, and get a good start on a few constructors to grab any resources you find.
Oh, one thing about resources I haven't seen mentioned around here (I'm sure it came up really early on) : if you see an enemy constructor heading for one of your unclaimed resources and you can't beat it with one of your own and don't want to shoot it down (causing a war)... surround it with 8 ships

I've found myself using star fighters since I have so many kicking around, but even sensor drones would do. In any case, the enemy constructors can't get to the resource and they keep piling up... I've seen ~20 Arcean constructors piled up in a queue waiting for a gap in my star fighter ring around a resource... if I had felt mean at the time, that could have been quite the turkey shoot

... this is all quite "cheese"-y, though, I'm sure.